into the becoming

i won't deny that i've had a big backslide on my whole "creating a better frog" thing. i've gained about 10 pounds back, and i'm really feeling it. i feel like i'm trying so hard, but at the same time...it's obviously not enough, and i wonder if i'm just telling myself that i'm trying so hard, and really not trying at all.

i decided that i really need to find someone (or group of someones) to hold me accountable. i need people who don't know me, have unbiased opinions and don't care if i have a headache or my feet hurt or whateverelsepoorfrogexcuseicomeupwith. Someone who expects...well...obedience, i guess, though i hate to relate this to D/s.