into the becoming

i left work at noon today - both for my mental health and for the safety of others. i don't really know what happened...i just know that suddenly, someone was bitching at me about suing the company for mental strain if their direct deposit hadn't been cancelled...at 6:30 in the morning.

Man, fuck you guys. Fuck you and the bitchy horse you rode in on, cause DAMN. i lost it. i mean...WTF am i supposed to say to that?!

"Uh...good luck with that..."

i get so fucking TIRED and disappointed in these people who are supposed to be grown-ups - most of them old enough to be my freakin PARENTS - but are mentally no older than a crabby 2-year-old. i am TIRED of getting attitude just because they "need someone to vent to." i am TIRED of having these dillholes lie to my face, just because they think i'm too dumb to notice. i am TIRED of having to repeat the rules EVERY. SINGLE. DAY because they keep looking for a way to get around the rules to suit their needs.

And you know what? i'm tired of being disappointed. i'm tired of putting such high expectations on people, because by now, i should know that i'm just going to see them dragged through the mud.

i know i'm doing this to myself...especially the expectations i put on people i thought were my friends.

i think...the entire world just got too damn selfish for me today...and i had to go find me again.