into the becoming

Foods eaten: banana, yogurt, soup, pear, pork chop, cottage cheese, dinner roll

Total caloric intake: 990

Exercise: office work, 1/2 mile walk, 30 minutes on bike

Calories burned: 2461

Current weight: 263

6:29am

i got up this morning and did my full workout. i really didn't want to, but i did it. i thought about even breaking it up in half, but i did the whole thing. And today, i'm going to dig myself in and eat what i'm supposed to be eating...instead of everything else on the planet. =/

If i want to continue to loose weight, this is what i have to do. Period. No waffling (Mmm....waffles...), no hedging, no "this one little thing won't hurt me." This is what i have to do.

7:31am

"Someone who is addicted to eating is actually starving on an emotional and spiritual level. Her longing for food is a longing for emotional and spiritual nourishment." - Eating in the Light of the Moon: How Women Can Transform Their Relationship With Food Through Myths, Metaphors & Storytelling by Anita A. Johnston PhD.

*blink*

i need to come back to this.

3:27pm

Okay, so. Am i starved? Looking back...and looking at everything that changed and that i realized over that one weekend this all started...yeah, i think i am. And i think that i'm able to (somewhat) control that now because i'm aware of it now and making changes.

That's a pretty big thing to realize, actually.